I’m OK. And I’m going to be OK. Therapy outcomes.

Your trained counsellors and therapists are often brain-bashed into establishing a clear goal upfront with you, our clients. If you’ve had coaching, then I’d expect that same goal-orientated focus. How else do you measure your success, and my value for money?

But…

When we first speak, in the back of my mind is, “are you OK?” and “will you be OK in any and every situation?”.

That’s not an objective. But, I feel it’s about as good an outcome from counselling and therapy as there can be.

What do you think?

“Impossible”?

“But my hair is on fire right now!! HELP”

“I want to fix XYZ”

Maybe you’re thinking “if only my boss/parent/partner would sort themselves out”?

So why do I hold on to “are you ok?” and “”will you be OK in any and every situation?”?:

1. The life jacket / oxygen mask: you know the drill. You have to put yours on first or you’ll be lost and not able to help anyone else. So, we work on your stuff and helping you be “OK” first.
2. Maybe you’ve never felt “OK”. Counselling may not be the answer for your particular situation, but let’s at least discuss what isn’t OK and see if we can’t gain some insight and a plan.
3. Once you start to feel “OK” again, then what? We review. Draw breath. Take a few of the insights and expand on them so that, when the next crisis inevitably hits, it’s a process, not a crisis. You can trust you’ll be OK in any situation. Sounds like magic? It will hopefully just feel like you being you, finally. Really you. Carl Rogers would have called this Organismic Valuing.

Analogy time:

• Once you’ve eaten that first fish…
• Once you’ve learned how to fish and fed yourself…
• Once you’ve been able to offer fish to those around you…
• Then we can maybe move on to how you teach others to fish?
• Similarly, once you’re feeling “OK”, aware of how you are and can adapt and be “OK” in any situation, then maybe your friends and relatives can also benefit? Just a thought. You don’t need to preach a sermon. You might just stop with that delicious first fish. You might happily feel “OK” again. That’s great! But many of my counselling clients talk about friends, family and colleagues gravitating towards them and asking them HOW they have changed.

Have goals. And let’s work with those goals. I’d like to think you’ll also feel “OK” again as a side result of our work together. An outcome. I’m available for 15 minutes for a free chat about your goals, or just about feeling “OK” again… or the price of fish.

Angus (not always “OK”, but confident I know how to get back there in any situation and share this process successfully)